im not like what you thought .
Monday, August 31, 2009 @ 10:02 PM
I SWEAR , ITS KILLING ME SLOWLY !
Yes , im a very good actress i know .
But hey , im not like what you think .
You've been the special one , yes , i swear .
But , you really dont understand what im trying to say .
Im here , having a hard time , to get over what just happened and you there , hoping something nice for yourself . REMEMBER , i just had a break down ! Don't you understand ?
IM NOT READY YET !
IM NOT USING YOU !
yes , we are fated to love each other but we are not fated to be together !
i thought you were the one ...
i'll be back !
Sunday, August 30, 2009 @ 10:27 PM
Blogskin will di-edit soooooon .
im busyyy nowadays .
okay , byeeeee .
toodles !
Labels: i heart shzwn .
you brightened up this life .
Friday, August 28, 2009 @ 10:33 PM
Not the sad part but the happy part please . Firstly , 8:22pm , 280809 , he ended our relationship . So yeah , im back to single life all over again . Oh , I swear , i so love today , i mean , everything happens for a reason and yeah , i really understand why now , why this things happened to me and must be today . Really , omg . I just simply love today alot . Not the breaking up pls .
Firsly , he's the reason that im happy today , tonight . He's the one who made me smile tonight after the breaking up . I found him , he gave my happiness back . I've been searching for this happiness for months and now , i found them all over again . He's the one guy that had brighten up my darkest light in my life and I found you in/for my future, Wan . Thank you so much Shazwan Evol .
Sucha coincident isnt it Wan ? (:
And , yes , I DARE to SWEAR , I MISS SHAZWAN SO MUCHHH !
- Webcaming with him was super hilarious and too super duper sweeet . XD
Let me end here , takecare peeps .Toodles ~ !
Labels: Shzwn ., your patience wont be wasted
im in pain .
Thursday, August 27, 2009 @ 7:51 PM
All i could reply was my forced grin . Ive been asking myself , why am i sacrificing when i dont get anything positive in return . Now , i really dont understand my life , myself . Since i changed to SP , i really cant change back to SA fully . Im a different person , im not SA nor SP . Its like im combined now , SA and SP . Im so lost in the world of broken heart and fragile-ness of my heart . Im doing badly in studies and idk when this things gonna stop . If it wasnt you who end it , i life wouldnt have turned out this way . Although i know , this is a test for me but its too hard from me to handle , because i have to handle on my own . Even if someone asked me whether they could helped me out , i said NO because i dont want to burden anyone because of something , because its my problem , my mind set is that , its my problem , i solved it on my own , just by myself but the actual fact , i need helping hands . All this while , ive not really spoken the truth to anyone , my mouth gets heavier each day to tell those truths . So i just kept quite and keep it inside . Thats when no one knows , everything happened hurts me alot . Im not good at expressing myself . No , im not good at telling truths . Yes , im good at giving those fake smiles , fake laughters , pretending im fine , yes . Im good at those things . Yes , every step i fall , i stand and save myself eventhough it takes time and this things will repeat . As i grew older each time , i learnt something new , i became much more wise . Im good at keeping secrets . Too good . Till i never find a way to let it go and just have to keep it inside . Im so weak now . So weak . Im not like how you looked at me , no im not .
Im so so far from perfect . Although there's a phrase saying , " No One Is Perfect " . I have my wishes , I have my hopes and im still not sure , when can i achieve them . When can i have my happiness back ? When can i have my love back ? .... the saddest part is that everyone's changing , world has turned upside down now .
love , why are you doing this to me ? WHY ?! when you know , what i wanted all this while , is a reasonable answer from you . thats all . if you dont feel like going on this relationship anymore , just tell me , i can end it off . dont keep me waiting/hanging here like an idiotic , crazy girl . pls , im so tired and so sick of waiting . you should understand , im giving you a way now . i need an answer asap , an explanation . you are not cooperating , how am i supposed to be good , you dont care , so what am i supposed to react ? ive tried my best and im tired . if im really too tired . i tell you , i will not hesitate to end this . really . even if i have to break those promises . i texted , you hang it like how our relationship is hanging on . you wont be calling . omfg . im so not convinced all this while . maybe yes , for awhile but not anymore now . im lost in your world .
no i dont wanna go to bed , mad at you cause i can't sleep thru the pain .
im back !
Wednesday, August 26, 2009 @ 3:00 PM
kae , firstly im sorry for not updating from the last few days . busy fasting . XD
this second im in school , computer lab 3 . HAHA . had a meeting but till this second , idk a thing . the important ppl are not here . lol . right , so yea , school was o-kay , fine , fun , i guess .
lessons i guess , just fine . yesterday , during maths class , NatyQa and myself crapped about our 'children' . NatyQa told me about her 1 month pregnancy . HAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHA !
i told her about my 3 weeks pregnancy . Ne-yo's Baby and Robert's Baby . HAHAHA !!
okay , seriously , we crapped alot like F . today he let me down again .
Right , gonna stop here . I gotta some work now .
Bye . Tc . Too-the-less ~
HAPPY BREAK FASTING , MUSLIM-ers ! ;D
Labels: i miss you . i miss the old me, i swear .
Fasting Month .
Friday, August 21, 2009 @ 9:44 PM
hellooo .
haha . im back right here , right now . i was supposed to update yesterday but i didnt , busy bussey . busy sgt . too many things happened yesterday . too many . too many to share and its a privacy thinggy also , so yeah bebeyh . omg , time really flies super freaking fast .
tomorrow fasting !!!! and now , my stomach is making some music .
gotta be honest , im not excited to puasa and hari raya . i dont feel like celebrating this yr .
siannn leyhs . maybe the excitement will come later but not now . im still buseeey with somethings , which i think , i dont even bother about this things . lol .
right , more updates to come . too-the-less ! ;D
To all muslims : Selamat Berpuasa ! Jgn Ponteng Oi !
PS : my blog song is so cute . hahaha . my only .
Labels: great escape, love .
McD .
Wednesday, August 19, 2009 @ 8:03 PM
okay , updating bcos Solihin asked me to . -.-
okay , today school was fine , lessons were o-kay . after school , was supposed to have that teacher's day audition , somehow , it was postponed to friday . so yeah , was supposed to 'lepak' with him . but it ended up , no , he had something else to do . so , went to McD with UC and some other friends from 2v6 and also Barney . hang out over there for awhile then , the rest went to Ajmal's house to do their sci project , i stayed with Barney in McD , we were exchanging stories and i saw Allyshah's mother + brother and 2 more ppl . OMFG ! from BP till JW . i just kept quite and Ashroff kept on staring at me , i just froze there . hahaha . wanna go to them but i just cant , idk why . ahhhhh , malu sia ! anw , Allyshah is my BF during pri sch . haha . Minah Ah Rep !
after that , went back to sch with Barney cos she wanna meet Eqah , so went back to sch , hoping he's still in sch but he went back ald . hah . right , netballers were having their practice .
so yeah , watched them , Jaz , Dayat and Shaq/Shan(?) was there too . went back home alone , since Sha went back first , so yeah .
so let me end here . takecareeee peeeps . :D
too many barriers .
Labels: tmrw's date nice ah ?
one last ;
Monday, August 17, 2009 @ 5:52 PM
helloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo !
ive beeeeeen listening to this song , up above for like 1234567910 times and i still doesnt get bored listening to this song . im not sure why i kept listening to this song . urhmmm ? altho its an old song . but its sucha sweeet but still sad song .
why ah ? lol . okay nevermind . school was AS USUAL , boring . but although its like that , i still (just) like after school . ohhh , i didnt regret attending that maths remedial just now . :D
right . ive been stressing nowadays . mood have been so down . felt so sicked , sicked of what , dont ask . right . chatted with Fadly , ex pri sch mate. Oh , you crapppppp alot , man !
those questions that has been flying thru my mind was ;
- why does he react that way when he saw me ?
- whats the meaning behind those sharp eyes ?
- why does this kind of things happened ?
- why must it happened to me ?
- whats the story behind all this ?
- just fate or coincidence ?
- lastly , apekah hikmah disebalik kejadian yang terjadi pada diri Shekyn Ahmad ?
mak kau , boleh buat essay . okay . IM BORED MAN !
okay , byeeeeeeee . takecareeeee . anws , there's more pictures fr the previous post . so wait and watch .
TOOO-THE-LESS !
west coast park .
Saturday, August 15, 2009 @ 10:01 PM
im feeling thumbs up . every goes calmly now . hopefully . so yeah , today was supposed to go to Concourse Esplanade to watch Sleeq's performance , sadly , i missed it because Barney cant go with me . So yeah , i wasnt really sad about it . Everyone's busy today it seems so i thought of going out on my own today to somewhere that i could you knoww , release some stressful things out after a harsh and completely sad day yesterday . told Sha about going to WCP all alone by myself but Sha was kindda afraid for me to go all alone there , she said , she doesnt want me to commit suicide . WTH . haha . my plan to go there was to study . really . kay nevermind , met Sha and Shud at the opp bustop infront of my house , they accompanied me to sent caca to JYSS . so yeah , thanks alot Sha and Shud , went to JP for lunch and also to meet Siddiq and Aiman , somekind of project they are having . after a while , we planned to go to WCP , succeeded to reach there . haha . so went to the usual place i went last time , omfg .
sat at the rocks and started to get emotional , but im fineee . (:
we drink and eat there . those waves was really harsh on us , haha .
after a while , i started to missed love , texted him and he called me , he thought i was in the library , library with waves . AH , betol . lollies ! while waiting fr Sha's EHEM to come by , talked to love otp . after Sha's EHEM came , Shud went wondering around and sat by sea , same goes for me , sat there and talked to love also started to get emotional [again] . wtva wtva , took bus 176 back to Teban and 30 back to JP . reached home around 715 , magrib magrib oi !
bad bad bad ! and now , im here posting . hahaaaaaa . :D
now , pictures will do the talking ayeeee .
inside bus , otw to WCP . durhhhhhh ~
never forget the present .
Nurul Ashikin Ahmad Salleh
cant lie , i really miss my past . kay , shuddup .
so yea , chatted with Kaz just now and he does understand ladies yeaa . :D
post this thing out because its touching .
Labels: eviferomsyad .
Happy Birthday Brother !
Thursday, August 13, 2009 @ 10:00 PM
heyyoo .
posting out just to wish my beloved brother up there thats now in Taiwan , performing his National Service , whatever .
A Happy Happy Birthday Yeay !
Whats his age eh ? 23 ... ? Okay nevermind .
Takecareee and Stay Cool and keep on becoming a joker . Thanks . Lols .
10 more days and you will be back in sgp ! YEAYYYYYYYYYA !
I realised that , i look quite diff comparing with my sisters and my brother up there except fr my first silly brother . Hahs .
Right , Okay , Too-The-Less !
Ups and Downs .
Wednesday, August 12, 2009 @ 7:40 PM
School has been super stressful for me . Exams coming . SCs gotta work it out for Teacher's Day Celebration , OMFG . They depend on us only sia . I mean , the sec 2s only . Omg , since next yr we're gonna be the seniors . OHMY ! With problems here and there .
Im still trying very hard to be sincere and hold on to everything that happened and gonna happen . Still good , still good . Okay , lets stop here .
Love is just a trial . Test of Endurance , Patience & Forgiveness .
Labels: SA is still a strong lady .
Sentosa , Sarah .
Tuesday, August 11, 2009 @ 10:32 PM
What happened yesterday ?
- Went Sentosa with 2v6 + some other ppl .
- Headed to Vivo , breakfast .
- Halfway thru heading to Beach , get free try to curl hair from one english man .
( Oh , he pulled Lala and myself away ) .
- Headed to Siloso Beach after that .
- Camwhored .
- Went separate ways .
- Lala , Zaza and myself headed to JP . Cancelled meeting Rasidah .
- Walk2 , Eat2 .
- Home Sweet Home .
Lastly , the outing wasnt that fun because [ insert reason ] . Let the pictures do the talking now .
New Hair Done . XD
Sorry , this was suppose to be a candid because im not ready to take a pic .
Lastly , i will be evil tmrw only to him .
Yessah , SARAH menang uh aye ! Hahahaha .
Yessah , at the same time , can bully him . Lols !
Akibatnyeeeee . :D
*winkwink* to love .
Right , byebyeeeeeeeee . Toooooodddeeeeleeesss . Too - The - Less .
beautiful nightmare .
Sunday, August 9, 2009 @ 8:56 PM
Ohmyfreakingay . Im missing love like !#%&(@$^*)! , seriously . Can dieeee man like that .
Oh yes , my purpose to post because , I wanna tell you guys that , IM MISSING NDP08 , IM MISSING Evergreen's , Pei Hwa's . Aiyoyoyo . Watched NDP09 just now and i felt as if my heart was snatched away . Omg . Its not suppose to miss this way . Lols .
Kay , whatever . Lala asked me to tag along with 2v6 to Sentosa , I wanna go but no one is tagging along with me it seems . Siann sia . I dont wanna be the only 2s4 kiddo down there .
Erggh , anyone tagging me , Love , Roy , Khan ? Anyone ? Omg .
Right , idk why im feeling this way tonight , my feeling is like , disappointed and missing someone super badly . Aiyoooooo . Nevermind . Bluehh .
Cause I Know This Is The Kind Of Feelings That Will Pop Out Once I Turned Out To Be SA .
He's sucha understanding guy .
Although he might not be the sweetest but he's the the trustworthy kind.
Its much better than being sweet. Too sweet no good aye . *flashback*
ievoluoy , 060609 .
Labels: this innocence is brilliant .
Rentak Singapura and NDP09 .
@ 11:43 AM
Its A LONG post .
OMFG ! I freaking loveee yesterday Rentak Singapura . Its absolutely , tremendously , super the duper the really freaking happening , fantastic , powerful , wonderful , excitement , anxious , curiousity , awesome like idk how to describe anymore . Its just rocking & rolling , jiwang-ish . Nevermind . Blueh .
Went out with Sister T around 445 and actually , we are ald late so we took taxi . Fetched Sister S at Marsiling MRT Station , went straight to Republic Poly(RP!) , it was only 5+ , waited infront of the TRCC door , lols . Waited for the door to open almost 2 hours sia . WOAH !
When the door finally opened , everyone started to rushed in , so yeah , im always the one who get sits fr my dear sisters , as usual , i went down the stairs and get the first sits . HAH !
Sucha nice place to watch those ppl . Okay , so around 8 , the concert started .
Anws , its a live band concert . We head-bangs and stuff like that . Seriously . (:
The artistes that involved is ;
- The Sallys .
- Nana .
- Salmah .
- Kumpulan Merah [ Vokalis Hawtstuff ] .
- DJs from Ria , 89.7 .
- Zaibaktian .
- Chirul , Wawan! , Kunjung , Sarah Aqilah! .
- SLEEEEEEEEQ !
- DIDICAZLI !!!
- Noor Aqmal [ Juara Projek Rentak ] .
- Shahridzuan [ Naib Juara PR ] .
- HADY MIRZA , I swear , He's hawt yesterday . LOLs .
- TAUFIKKKKK BATISAHHHHH !
Many many moreeee !
First stop , The Sallys sang Kopi Dangdut , Marmalade . At first , they played My Love tune which made me excited , sekali diff . -.-' It was sucha rocking nice to start a concert to hype(r) ppl up . Nana's turned , as usual , she sang Lafaz , OMFG , POWER TO THE CORE !
Salmah sang (iforgottenwhatsthetite) . Kumpulan Merah sang Cintaku , Andai and another song . Gosh , the vocalist , H-A-W-T . DJs , Fiza O , AB Sheik , Nona and Shai super damn hilarious . Zaibaktian , sang Lelaki Baru and Ejen Cinta , Sleeq , Cun Saja and Impianku , Didicazli , Relaaaaa Setiaaaaa and Impianku . OMFG ! I admiring him from far like WHAT !
Shahridzuan , speech the less . Anugerah Finalist sang their usual song . Hady sang Angkasa , Taufik sang Nafasku , combined song , they sang Kepadanya , there's also one group , the vocalist was someone from Anugerah Band . Whats the name of his band again ?
The last part , everything was just rockish , rolling when everyone went WOOO WOOO !
I mean , actually , the wholeeeeee 3 hours inside theatre , i shout my lungs out , i never give chance , yesterday night , i almost lost my voice but yeah , i know my voice wont lose . I still have my voice with me . :D
Taufik , Didicazli , Hady , Zaibaktian went down stage . OMFG .
Gosh , okay , let me stop here before i start posting more things out here , because , its really gonna be a very the super the duper the long post . So yeah , anything , feel free to ask me . LOLs .
Let the pic do some talking after the concert . (:
Lastly , HAPPY 44th BIRTHDAY TO SINGAPORE ! yeayyyyyyyyya !!
Rentak Singapura .
Saturday, August 8, 2009 @ 11:08 AM
heyyyo !
right ! , now its 11:08am . Around 5 more hours , i will be out from house to Republic Poly , TRCC to meet the guy up there in the vid . :D
+ MMV , Sleeq , Zaibaktian , Anugerah Finalist , moreeee to comee . :D
I will update more tmrw abt today's event aite .
One quotation from Sir Zul :
True Friends See The Hurt In Your Eyes When Everyone Else Is Fooled By Your Smile .
Its a lil senget bcos his hand is much bigger than mine . HAHAHAHHA ! XD
Labels: SA is back .
Parade and 060609 love .
Friday, August 7, 2009 @ 4:08 PM
Ohhhhhh . Woke up around 5am today . WOAH , ngantok siaak . Got ready fr parade , had my breakfast and headed to school . Reached school around 630 . Waited fr Rasidah , Natyqa and Lala . Falled in infront of NCDCC room around 645 . I was super nervous the whole day , i swear . Parade was tremendously great . G-O-O-D J-O-B , good job good job good job good job to those who performed ! It was sucha trilling time . LOLs . It was freaking funnn man . Hard work paid off . *phew* After school , Lala wanted to go for a 'date' with Don . LOLs but Don was somewhere , so went to void deck and start watching sucha touching + saddening scene from Rasidah . Barney , Yulie , NatyQa , Zaza and Lala was there too to witnessed something . Omfg , seriously . Make a wise decision eh . Pity Jaz . Seriously . Went to Gek Poh then all of them went separate ways , left Lala , NatyQa and myself . Skipped . Met Don , Rafiq and Sherdlikyn came over . Since theres police all around , we went to sat infront of GP , what block , idk . Chit chat , joke joke , beat beat . Wtva2 , camwhored but sadly , pity Rafiq , cos no one to talked to him since Sherdlikyn is with me . Pasrah eh Fiq ? Half way thru , Rafiq went back , left me , Lala , Don and Sherdlikyn . Around 220 , Don sent Lala home and Sherdlikyn sent me to the bustop and waited with me till the bus came . Here iam , blogging now . Its ald , 4:32pm .
Yeay , anw , Happy [belated] 2nd Monthsarry Aye ! It was yesterday btw . Lollies .
Nice spending time with you , love . Heh . :D
Enjoy the pictures yeayya !
PS for Brother :
OMG . Brother , takecare of yourself . Get rid of that typhoon , stay indoors aite .
God , save my brother .
Msg for Twinneh :
CEPAT SEMBOH ! Datang sekola and rock the house . I miss Twinneh ! Booh .
my anak sedares . gotta baby sit them fr like 1 month . omg !
love .
Shekyn Ahmad .
Labels: so much fr my happy ending .
wtva uh seh .
Wednesday, August 5, 2009 @ 9:30 PM
right , school was as usual . boredom .
NCDCC training was fine , it was fun , getting scolded + joking around with sirs and maams .
omg , friday ah friday ! im kind off excited to wear that [ insert word ] .
hah !
firstly , i just wanna tell you eh btch , tkya nak stare up down ehh .
secondly , dont come to me and tell/ask me who the hell is my boyfriend .
thirdly , i know ive changed , but only a few person knows the real reason why im this way and knows my secret . so yeah . sorry if i hurt anyone's feelings , it wasnt my intention but never force me to do with intention . my whole self was affected all bcos of SOME pple . so sorry yeah , to the pple who was affected by me . i have to do this kind of things . sorry yeah .
first time in history , i had someone who hates me . omfg . wtva eh btch .
2 MORE HOURS LOVEEEEEEEE !
so sweet of you , telling me its one more day . heh .
Labels: i can be bad, i can be good . which one ?
beautiful soul .
Tuesday, August 4, 2009 @ 8:08 PM
to someone who dedicate me this song , tysm yeahhh . heeh .
i wanna otp with love and make him jealous mannn !
HYDIR AH HYDIR !
SARAH AH SARAH ! XD
imysm lehh .
two more days and surprise ehh , remember !
KAY , wanna watch Anugerah now . Okay byebyeeeeeeee .
Labels: two more days loveee .
Quiz .
Monday, August 3, 2009 @ 8:26 PM
1. Are you single or attached?
- Attached.
2. Do you have a person you like?
- Yes .
3. What is the name of the person that you're in love with?
- MSSBH .
4. If the person you love and you mum dropped into the sea, who will you save?
- Mum lahhh .
5. Have you ever hugged someone before?
- Yes , durhhhhhhhhh ~
6. Do you love your parents?
- I dont wish to answer a question like this .
7. Will you hug the one you love?
- Yes .
8. Are you willing to do anything for your boyfriend/girlfriend?
- Yes , please .
9. Are you jealous now?
- No , kot . Im just mad .
10. Who is the last person that messaged you?
- Yaya .
11. Who is clique?
- Someone , Somewhere .
12. Do you want babies in future?
- Hehhhs , yes . XD
13. Do you prefer Macdonald,KFC,Long John Sliver,Burger King or coffee shop?
- Urrrrhhhmmmm , all can .
14. Do you sniff glue?
- EERRGGGHH , NO LAH .
15. Do you smoke?
- OMFG ?! NO !!
16. If your boyfriend/girlfriend is a 2-timer, what will you do?
- " Go & Die Ahhhhhh ! " OR " Leaveeeeeee me ahhhh ! "
17. What CCA are you in now?
- NCDCC.
18. If you're rich now, what'll you do?
- Go shopping ahhhh!
19. If the one you're in love with, held your hand, what'll you do?
- Nothing , kot .
20. If the one you love, reject you, what'll you do?
- " Go & Die Ahhhhhhh ! "
21. What is your favourite cartoon characters?
- Poooooh Babbyyy !
22. Friendship or love?
- Friend Love .
23. Cookie monster or Elmo?
- Elmo .
24. Do you use laptop or computer?
- Laptop.
25. Do you like loliipop.
- Yes.
26. Do you have dairy.
- Dairy/Diary? Lol. Dairy; no. Diary; yes.
27. There's an admirer of yours and he won't die heart, what'll you do?
- Waainaaaalillah ... Sucha complicated qn to answer . I shall not say a thing .
28. If you quarrel with your boyfriend/girlfriend and he/she wants to break, what'll you do?
- Ask why then cry then see how but usually , if thats what he wanted , i shall berserah .
29. Are you blur?
Yes.
30. If you can have your hair dyed, what colour do you want it to be?
- Pink , Red , Green . XD Kidding . Brunette-ish .
31. Who is the last person you chatted in your MSN?
- MiminMeera.
32. How many boys/girls have you beaten before?
- Wah, numerous ah. :D
33. If your boyfriend/girlfriend don't love you anymore, what'll you do?
- HAISH . Shall ask him , what he wants from me now .
34. What school are you in?
Pioneer Sec.
35. Tag 10 besties/friend to do this quiz:
- Shafiqa .
- Shazwan .
- Natyqa.
- Kirawan.
- Zaza.
- Ajmal.
- Solihin .
- Shud .
- Hazwan .
- Iraaa .
Today was fcuking tiring and Im so emotionally disturbed . Emotionally broken down .
Love , if what he said was true . I wanna ask you , what do you want from me now .
Yes , you've changed since that day . Why ? You left me with a BIG question mark .
Dont you know that ? Prove me wrong , please . Please . Proof what im thinking is wrong .
Ive never wanted this after i developed feelings fr you . No , never . Please .
Have you ever known the truth ? Heart pain , I swear . Am i the one at fault now ? Yeah , im sure there's my mistakes too but do you understand my real situation ? .
Pictures from the last few days activities . Enjoyyy . Byebyeee . (:
lazy uh wanna upload many many pics , so this is it . the end .
Labels: expect the unexpected .
